(Since the Antifits has also something to do with the tribulations of a Political Science Major here in Mahattan, I just thought it would be incomplete without a Saturday morning laundry incident. And in this world where it seems we need a little bit of humor, I guess I thought I should ease it a bit.)
I had a free Laundry today.
The Detergent was Kenny's.
The Washing Machine was all of Nina and Julie.
And anyone doubting the Bay Area's economic prowess better take it up the ass since it was Ms. Reisner who paid for the expansive drying the massive accumulation of a month took. And her Campus Cash, by the way, has enough on it to do my Laundry in its entirety a three- hundred- fifty times.
And getting up Lydia to tell the tale.
Yet it was a difficult time.
Saturday morning's are never easy. I looked like a tool, wore shoes without socks, and a T- Shirt which found place in the clearance section of H and M when they were new. They are now three years old. The in- house phrase is that I looked like a Dodo. The Dodo is a flightless bird endemic to the Indian ocean islands of the Mauritius. Redemption comes on the fact the Dodo is part of the Mauritian Coat of Arms.
Ostensibly, the tiny state of Mauritius has a lot going for itself!
And Ruthie, if you have a conscious, you should think about giving some of that Campus Cash to Mauritius. Maybe adopt a child.
I was wearing shorts too. But yes, the Shorts were not mine either. They belonged to Kenny.
But NYU needs to give a serious rethink. If you want the kids to make Saturday mornings productive, as my intentions were, better have something working. And yes, an Asian at the Desk does not work. As I told him the Campus Machine did not work, he threw some technical jargon at me how to top my Campus Cash online. Of course, I was unsuccessful at it. Or even better was that he thought I could use the Machine on Weinstein. At 10 in the morning, when it was freezing, and when I was dressed to kill, Across the park is almost like Across the Universe.
Only though sitting through Across the Universe was a little more difficult.
Yes, all the guides you read before College told you to do Laundry on Friday and Saturday mornings. The reason being that as a future generation of America readies itself after a night of severe intoxication, random hook- ups, and puke in the hallway, Laundry is the last thing on their minds.
But trust me, the Laundry is empty because of a reason.
And the fantasy of meeting a smokin' hot babe in the laundry room is impossible. A Saturday morning laundry room resembles an assortment of people who would be the Geek Squad who would wet their pants seeing Star Wars, the Gamers who never got laid and a random white guy. Apart from that random white dude, all of them would be Asian.
And all said and done, I got the Laundry done for free and I am Asian myself. A loud Thank You to everybody who made it possible!
And while at it, I had the most raucous debate of my life with a random dude (yes, an Asian) whether the new ThinkPad X300 could ever be as good as the MacBook Air.
Saturday morning laundry, Damn!
I still cannot understand the random white dude..